128565

Joke of the Day

"It is too hot in India now There's a cap for that."

"How many emo kids does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, they just sit in the dark and cry."

"None of my boyfriends even know they're dating me."

"ME: where's your brother? OLDEST CHILD: where's another roll of duct tape? ME: *sprints to the basement*"

"Did you hear about the Alaska native that didn't like fish? Yeah, he just wasn't inuit."

"What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed? Oh sheeet."

"I'm sure everything will be fine. I'm sure of lots of things that are wrong. I'm highly fallible."

"NSFW - Getting a kiss might make your day, ... Getting a kiss might make your day, but getting anal will make your hole weak. Read this in a porta-poty at Roskilda music festival last week."

"""911, what is your emergency?"" I got stuck in a beaded curtain ""Again?"" SEND HELP"

"I just seen a kid yell at his dad and tell him ""No jerk!"" I yelled at my dad once when I was 12, then I woke up and I was 16."