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Joke of the Day

"Fidel Castro is dead Looks like Keith Richards and the Queen of England are moving on to the finals."

"What's the best way to get chewing gum out of your hair? Cancer..."

"Why am I fat? Every time I fuck your girlfriend, she gives me a cookie"

"What's green and fuzzy, has six legs, and if it fell out of a tree would kill you? A pool table."

"Why do people in Beijing smoke so many cigarettes? To get a breath of filtered air."

"I'm not a doctor, but I play one on eHarmony."

"Some morbid baby jokes What's scarier then ten babies in one jar? A: One baby in ten jars How do you got a baby in a container? A: blend it."

"I'm addicted to Soap But I'm clean now"

"I don't smoke to be cool, I smoke so no one asks me to hold their baby."

"I'm jealous of Santa... ...he can yell ""hoe hoe hoe"" at anyone and get away with it."