128147

Joke of the Day

"Did you know some dogs don't pass the Police Academy? ...they didn't pass the pawlygraph test."

"What do you call an anorexic girl with a yeast infection? Quarter-pounder with cheese"

"What do you call a cheap maid uniform? Maid in China."

"You Gotta Hand It To Leave Brits They were so concerned about immigrants ruining their economy that they preempted it and ruined their economy themselves."

"They say that 1 out of a group of 5 guys is gay.... I'm really hoping it's Jake, because he's *super cute*."

"What's the difference between a Jew and a bullet? The bullet gets out of the chamber."

"How can a cat walk with no feet? He can't, it's impawsible."

"I wonder if flies ever think, ""I bet I could get this guy to slap himself in the face."" Because they'd be right."

"I saw my friend's girl sleeping with another man in the army but didn't tell him... It was a private affair."

"How does a mathematician cure constipation? How does a mathematician cure her constipation? She works it out with a pencil."