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Joke of the Day

"Girl's idea of Valentine's Day. (???(?.? )? Guy's idea of Valentine's Day ( o )( o?(^?^?)"

"My kid missed the school bus, instantly resulting in drama & tears. But now that I've had a few cocktails, I'm OK."

"Why do Jewish fathers have their sons circumcised? They know Jewish women can't resist anything with 10% off."

"How do you request another Mormon wife? Brigham Young"

"Why can't the T-rex clap its hands? Because it's dead."

"It's in the Smile A boy met a girl.... Girl: Every time you smile, I feel like inviting you to my place. Boy (smiling): Why thank you... are you single? Girl: No, I am a dentist."

"I decided to take an aerobics class. I bent... twisted... gyrated... jumped up and down... and perspired for a half an hour. But by thetime I got my tights on.... the class was over!"

"I read a story about a guy who cried while pleasuring himself. It was a real tear jerker."

"What is a whales favorite pasttime? Netflix and krill."

"how many pop punkers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? five, one to drop it and four to two step and PICK IT UP PICK IT UP PICK IT UP!"