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Joke of the Day

"I stayed at a hotel in Silicon Valley last night... The amenities were great. They even gave me a complementary metal-oxide-semiconductor."

"People who still say 'YOLO' only deserve to live once anyway."

"So I bought a new boomerang today, the problem is, I can't seem to throw away my old one."

"So there are the baby boomers, generation x, and millenials. What do we call the next generation? Fucked."

"It's amazing how many people are allergic to gluten, peanuts, and facts."

"According to North Korean press, Kim Jong Il has entered a sleeping contest. Ta-da!"

"Decadent: Posessing only ten teeth."

"Can't believe tomorrow is Take Your Alcohol to Work Day."

"I am upset with my parents for making me exist. u just decided to make a person one day? who's gonna pay my bills? me? I didn't ask for this"

"I hate cereal killers they go against the grain"