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Joke of the Day
"When the step kids start talking shit, I like to remind them that I am totally boning their mom."
Next Joke
"no dude, if i wash my hands BEFORE going to the bathroom then they won't get my genitals dirty and i won't have to wash my hands after. duh"
"My co-worker walks by holding asprin in his hand... He says, they say the weakest link in the chain goes first, I guess that's my head."
"Fail-proof diet: cut sugar, fats, pasta, alcohol, bread and wrists."
"How do you make a Bloody Nicole? Like a Bloody Mary, but with a stab of OJ..."
"How do we know that God isn't a woman? Because we're not all sandwiches"
"What's the difference between a Jew and a Muslim? Who cares! More bacon for me."
"Why don't ghosts have legs? Because they're so white the can't dance."
"""Hermit crab"" describes me twice."
"What did the Hawaiian terrorists say when they blew up a restaurant? ALOHA SNACKBAR"