127069

Joke of the Day

"Me: Saw your bf today ""Where?"" M: What's the name of that gym next door to the gay bar? ""Golds?"" M: Yeah, in the gay bar next to Golds"

"So, 50 Cent is accepting Bitcoin for his new album. Which is all well and good, but if he really wanted to court the cryptocurrency community, he should change his stage name to 0.0007745 ."

"""So, do you play any instruments?"" Me: *slaps knees for 30 minutes straight without breaking eye contact*"

"North Korean submarine accidentally destroys another North Korean submarine Woops, wrong sub"

"A cop pulls an illegal immigrant over near the US-Mexico border and asks ""Papers?"" The immigrant responds ""Scissors"" and drives away"

"Went to my psychologist and told him I feel like a pack of cards. He said hell deal with me later"

"What do you call a black person on the moon? An astronaut"

"A Jewish girl.. ..asks her father, ""Dad? Can I have 50 dollars?"" he says, ""40 dollars? What do you need 30 dollars for?"""

"Yo momma is so fat and old... When she farted it created the universe"

"How is a gay man like a tumbleweed? They blow and blow and blow until they end up stuck on a fence in Wyoming."