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Joke of the Day

"Why do mathematicians think that spring is summer? It's not their fault. May tricks them."

"[opens door for two Jehovah's witnesses] Ugh...ok come in. The goat blood is in a vial on the table. I'll get the virgin from the basement."

"Why do men name their penises? Because they don't like the idea of having a stranger make 90% of their decisions."

"I'm shit at telling jokes. I always punch up the fuck line."

"He was a poor country boy. She was a rich city girl. They never met, due to geographic distance and rigid socioeconomic stratification."

"A black guy called me a disgrace in front of his girlfriend, but then I realized he was introducing me to his girlfriend Grace."

"Women are generally speaking"

"My son's favorite toy is the free blood pressure machine at Walgreens."

"According to an old Irish saying... Summer is the best day of the year"

"I'm going to open a restaraunt called pantera bread It will be similar to panera bread, but the food we serve will be much heavier"