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Joke of the Day

"You know you're clumsy when you drop a stick playing air drums."

"What's the instrument of oppression? the Trumpet"

"Piers Morgan has taken a very strong stance against guns, and who can blame him? If you had a gun, you'd shoot him too."

"I ate a small Wookie steak for dinner... ...it was a little Chewie."

"print out the lyrics to ""Girls Just Wanna Fun"" and draw a red X through it all and you have the Quran, pretty much"

"""Beatles or Stones?"" I asked my son. ""Why can't we have something normal for dinner?"" He said"

"New Game Here's a new game we can all play! You have to use a long mallet to hit frozen potato treats through hoops on a field. All while dressed as a frontiersman I call it Croquette Crockett Croquet"

"I got kicked out of the army yesterday. They called it a dishonorable discharge.... ....i call it jizzing over the generals face whilst he was asleep."

"Me: Why do you love me? Wife: *shrugs* Me: Why do you find me annoying? Wife: *reveals six spreadsheets and a pie chart*"

"What did the blue denims say to the black denims? I guess we have different genes! *knee slap* ... I'll see myself to the door"