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Joke of the Day

"*surgeon opens cooler during transplant* *cooler is full of Gatorade* ""Wait but this means..."" *cut to surgeon's kids dumping kidney on coach*"

"How does Good King Wenceslas like his pizza? Deep pan, Crisp and Even"

"""My friend got me a Fitbit"" ME: Oh yeh, heard of them, haven't got one tho ""u can buy them online"" ME [whispering] u can buy friends online?"

"Know what OBGYN stands for? OBGYN: Oh Boy! Got You Naked!"

"Where did Hitler keep his armies? In his sleevies. ^^^^Sorry"

"Hurricane Malt Liquor: Because the power shouldn't be the only thing experiencing a blackout this weekend."

"An angry Hillary storms into Satan's office and yells ""You told me I was going to win!"" Satan looks up from the paper and says, ""Well, you told me you had a soul."""

"Two men walk into a bar... They're blind, it happens."

"What do you call the cleavage of someone with breast implants? Silicone Valley"

"What is the opposite of an iPad Mini? A Maxi Pad"