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Joke of the Day

"If you want someone to like you never text first. If they text you then don't text back. Never, ever talk. It's the only way to make it work"

"Who would won in a wrestling match; Lemmy or God? Trick question, lemmy is god... R.I.P. Edit* win not won damnit..."

"I tried to upload the Brazil vs Germany game to pornhub... But they removed it for rape"

"How a girl insults another Girl1: In my hand is your virginity. Girl2: But there's nothing on your hand! Girl1: Exactly."

"Couples who take too many fertility drugs should always put an asterisk next to their child's name to show that the parents used steroids."

"What did one tampon say to the other tampon? Nothing. They're stuck up bitches."

"What's the difference between a camel and a Russian? A camel can walk for 30 days without drinking but a Russian can drink for 30 days without walking."

"Me - That's the second First Baptist Church I've seen today. Wife - OK? M - One of them is lying. W - You can't ever shut it off can you?"

"What does a gay horse eat Haaaaayyyy!!"

"I was going to say a gay joke but fuck it."