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Joke of the Day

"What is worse than biting through an apple, and finding a worm inside? ~~Rape~~ The picky fuckers on this website."

"Only Pools And Corpses A new sitcom starring Michael Barrymore and Demi Moore."

"If Lord of the Rings starred Denzel Washington.... ...then at least there would be a Tolkien black guy."

"Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder."

"Werner Heisenberg's epitaph: Here lies Heisenberg. ^^^?"

"[Taylor Swift on toilet, going #2. Kanye jumps out of her shower] ""Yo, Taylor- I'm really happy for you & I'm-a let you finish, but..."""

"I made a couple mistakes during puberty I dropped the ball two times during it."

"What do you call a cow that's just had a baby? De-calfinated!"

"Yo mama's so fat when she takes a bath she fills the tub then turns on the water."

"If I make you breakfast in bed, a simple thank you is all I need. Don't concern yourself with how I got in your house."