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Joke of the Day

"*walking with my girlfriend on a beach* *i get down on one knee* ""will you ma..."" *a dog walks past & farts so loud it drowns out my voice*"

"What do feminists and Sports Authority have in common? They've got a rivalry with Dicks"

"Jesus came to me the other night Please let me out."

"I call my printer Bob Marley. Because it's always Jammin'."

"What do two sushi say after one tells a lame joke? ""Nigiri, please."""

"Why couldn't the man open a fish and herb shop? Because he didn't have the thyme or the plaice."

"[getting pulled over] Me: R u a bear cop? Bear cop: Is that a problem? Me: As long as you're not a maul cop *mauls me for bad pun*"

"What sounds like a robot and bumps into tables? Stephen Hawking."

"What do you call a fart in the middle of the night? What do you call a fart in the mourning? A midnight snack A hot Breakfast"

"I'm not a doctor, but I play one on eHarmony."