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Joke of the Day

"Democrats get back at the Republicans on their Christmas list by giving them fruitcakes. Republicans re-wrap them and send them to in-laws."

"9 out of 10 Americans agree ...that out of 10 Americans, one American will always disagree with the other nine."

"Yo mama so fat her nickname is ""Lardo"""

"Why won't the US change over to the Metric system? Because we'd rather die on our feet than live on your 30.48 centimeters."

"One. How many psychics does it take to change a lightbulb?"

"A sodium atom undergoes a vigorous reaction with flourine... How do you feel?"" Asks the fluoride ion. ""Positively shell shocked"" the sodium ion replied."

"Eat local. Your neighbor's food."

"Whats the difference between a priest and acne? Acne waits till you're 12 to come on your face"

"I want to open a gay bar in Germany called Pole-Land. You know they'll invade the place."

"*undercover cop knocks* Hi fill out this survey to win a free IPad! 1. name 2. address 3. email 4. where are drugs *mustache falls off*"