123020
Joke of the Day
"There's no 5 second rule at my house. The dog is much quicker than that."
Next Joke
"My microwave beeps if I don't open the door within 30 seconds of it stopping. I'm fat, microwave. I won't forget there's food in there."
"So Helen Keller walks into a bar Then she walks into a table. Then she walks into a lamp. Then she walks into the wa- ok, you get the idea."
"I hate when I think there's an open parking space and then I have to run over a motorcycle."
"when someone bumps into you, immediately say (loudly) ""oh no my hot bod!"""
"Donald Trump trying to make America read again He is trying to restore Borders."
"A handshake means something completely different to a cannibal."
"If zombies ever do attack, I'll just skip coffee that morning. They'll leave me alone because they'll think I'm one of them."
"Why did Regina George's dog only play keep-away? because fetch is not going to happen."
"What did the disgruntled alien customer say to the store clerk? Take me to your leader!"