122982

Joke of the Day

"I saw a guy on his motorcycle and the back of his shirt said ""If you can read this the b*tch fell off."""

"[creating the armadillo] GOD: I want a half turtle, ANGEL: Okay G: Half pig, A: Okay, I'm on it- G: Half anteater A: ...Are u drunk G: Very"

"Marathon Just won my first marathon. I am experiencing the thrill of victory and the agony of de feet."

"I'll keep my women like Flo Jo... ....dead"

"so apparently there isnt an app for pancreatic cancer. Ironic that something abbreviated PC killed Steve Jobs, does anyone think his funeral will be a flash affair?"

"A 92 year old man I randomly met told me this one: What do you get when you cross a turkey and a cat? A pussy gobbler."

"How will Donald Trump build such a huge wall without congressional approval? By forcing every Juan to work on it."

"D.E.L.T.A. Airlines Didn't Even Leave The Airport"

"What did the fish say when he hit the wall? damn."

"One time I got stuck holding a Starbucks door open from 2005-2007."