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Joke of the Day

"I spend more time on twitter than I do in church. I'd rather vent to imaginary friends on the Internet than to imaginary friends in the sky."

"16 year olds can vote in Scotland. That's ok because they've been drinking since they were 9 and understand disillusionment."

"Copper is highly conductive of electricity. Does that make it ""powermetal?"""

"Drunk texts are only fun if you're the one sending them. With that said, I'm having a blast right now."

"What's the only buttons that work on a redditor's computer? Copy + paste..."

"A bomb goes off at Reddit Wow, this blew up!"

"Two Pokemon players run right into each other, what does the one say to the other? This is Onixceptable."

"I asked my mom why she forced me to go to to singing lessons as a kid She said singing is a skill I need to a choir."

"Oh no sir, that shark wasn't attacking me, my wife was yelling at me from the shore so I was just trying to swim into his mouth."

"What is a pirates favorite letter? You may think it's R but it actually be the mighty C"