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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between Java and JavaScript? Java and JavaScript are similar in the same way car and carpet are."

"They polled Britons on their favorite Jane Austen novel 52% prefer Pride & Prejudice to Sense & Sensibility"

"So Muhammad Ali died recently and... I made the huge mistake telling my Muslim friend."

"To the raisin I just beat to death with my shoe.. Eww! I thought you were a spider. Eww! Someone's bringing raisins in my house."

"How many WASPs does it take to change a lightbulb? One."

"What do you call a sarcastic mountain chain? The Kappalachians."

"Duck Joke Q: Why did the duck go to jail? A: He was selling quack."

"""I'll see you in hell"" should be followed with ""and I won't even stop to say hi"". Otherwise you're just making plans with someone you hate"

"Voltaire said ""To learn who rules over you, simply find out who you are not allowed to criticize."" ...so I guess my granddaddy was right when he said that retards run this country."

"College is expensive, BUT your student ID saves $3 at the movies. So really it pays for itself if you go to the theater 30,000 times."