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Joke of the Day

"Q: What did the blonde do when she found out she was pregnant with triplets? A: She went looking for the three guys."

"I charged my phone, but I didn't have enough evidence to indict, so I had to let it go."

"My wife was proud that I admitted to also being married to someone else ...she said it was big of me"

"My New Year's Resolution was to stop making innuendo jokes about my sexual stamina. Day two and so far so good. I just hope I can keep it up."

"What was Carl Sagan really trying to say about the brain? In Soviet Russia, consciousness regulates the cerebral cortex."

"Give a man a match, and he'll be warm for a minute, but set him on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life."

"What is the difference between a black man and an elevator? An elevator can raise a child."

"What happened to Jesus when he went to Mount Olive? Popeye beat the shit out of him."

"What do you call it when a lizard has problems in the bedroom? A reptile dysfunction"

"Stupid people who suddenly make a smart decision have no idea how confusing that is for the rest of us."