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Joke of the Day
"[third date] Her: please quit calling me Jenny Me: oh my apologies Jennifer Her: my name is Amanda"
Next Joke
"My dirty language got me suspended in school but many years later I get rewarded with stars and retweets, never give up on your dreams kids."
"According to the stores .I should be in a Halloween costume, sitting under a Christmas tree eating turkey . I'm so confused."
"A man stands over the coffin of his deceased wife. ""Her star sign was cancer you know"" he says. "" I guess it's ironic..."" ""That she was killed by a giant crab."""
"While fixing my neighbors car I asked her for a screwdriver... She asked if I had orange juice. We've been dating since."
"So I was walking home from work.... And I saw this black guy carrying a tv and I thought it was mine but then I ran home and mine was still there shining my shoes."
"My local baseball team can't sell beer at the stadium anymore... They lost the opener! [wah wah](http://www.sadtrombone.com/)"
"Every onion looks like it was in an abusive relationship."
"What do you call a fight in Mexico? A Juan on Juan."
"Why did the joke on /r/jokes get removed? [removed]"