122679

Joke of the Day

"I wanted to build my career on making chemistry jokes to cure my depression. Then I realized alcohol is a solution."

"A woman got wooden breast implants yesterday. It would be funny if this joke had a punch line, wooden tit?"

"Did you hear about the Mayweather X Pacquiao fight? The bout was declared a bore."

"What do you call a number that can't keep still? A roamin numeral."

"What's the difference between a Dominican and a Cuban? Dominicans are close, but no cigar"

"Can you just bear with me for a moment? *grabs salmon out of stream. bites head off. hibernates.*"

"What do feminists do on Halloween? They go triggered treating"

"Mitt Romney dissing Trump is like when an anime villain from the previous arc teams up to help stop the new billion times more evil villain"

"Did you hear about the Coldplay concert in China last weekend? It was all yellow."

"Me and my wife decided to form a suicide pact... Weird thing was that after she killed herself, I didn't feel like dying anymore."