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Joke of the Day

"I had a goal to lose 20 Pounds by the end of the year. 30 pounds to go"

"Crazy the only reason some people are starving and suffering in the world is because they aren't ""so blessed""."

"TIFU by... Getting needled by a dirty prick."

"Soap addiction I used to be addicted to soap. But I'm clean now!!"

"How do you catch defish? With debate."

"I didn't see anyone important today, so I'll probably wear these same clothes tomorrow."

"Making plans with a stoner is like having sex with a prostitute... ...They tell you they're coming, but you know it's a lie."

"What was the dentist's horrific gastronomical invention? Tartar sauce."

"Just heard a lady say she's been shopping at this Kmart for the last 15 years, and I was like, ""doesn't your family miss you?"""

"I thought by this point in my life I would know what to do with my arms when I sleep, but nope, still confused."