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Joke of the Day

"Imagine if people referenced the Beach Boys more often! Wouldn't it be nice?"

"I hate one-dimensional games. They're so linear."

"I've fallen in love with a pencil and we're getting married. I can't wait to introduce my parents to my bride 2B."

"I'll put a comma, after a comma, even if it doesn't need a comma, to completely, drive you, insane."

"My mistress bought me a Neck Clampotron XXX 5 years ago, and I've never looked back since!"

"Felt bad about hitting a car yesterday but I remembered to leave a note. Didn't have a pen so I used my key."

"What did the footballer's girlfriend think when she saw him standing between some goal posts? ""He's a keeper"""

"[mastercard commercial] ""there are some things that money can't buy"" politician: i don't get it"

"How do trains from different countries understand each other? With a trainslator"

"Did you know Abe Lincoln was Jewish? He got shot in the temple"