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Joke of the Day

"If you don't pay your exorcist You get repossessed"

"Why does Dr Pepper come in a bottle? Because his wife is dead."

"If okcupid is all that great, then why would you need a 3 or 6 month subscription ?"

"Whats more bruised than an old apple? My asshole after a night with Caitlyn Jenner"

"Don't you say that about Java. Saying that Java is nice because it works on all OS's is like saying that anal sex is nice because it works on all genders"

"I went to see a topless ventriloquist last night. She was amazing, I never saw her lips moving once."

"Why are there no coups in the US? It is the only country without a US embassy. (heard from a Brazilian friend)"

"I used to think the brain was the most interesting part of the body. Then I realized what was telling me that."

"I'm special. My school told me so."

"I have a girlfriend Not sure if this is really a joke, but everyone laughs when I say it."