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Joke of the Day

"Yes hello 911, I put a smaller microwave inside a bigger microwave and now there's a wormhole in my kitchen"

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"Where'd the dog who lost his tail go to get a new one? A retail store."
"nothing sucks more than someone ignoring your texts i mean maybe like getting stabbed to death but that's not much worse"
"What do you call a cat on fire? A fur-nace"
"What do you call it when a prayer is answered? A coincidence."
"My sex life is exactly like my shopping. I do it all online."
"I'm sick of people blaming the Internet when someone gets killed. Watch the History Channel. Hitler didn't find the Jews on craigslist."
"This winter, ice crystals will stick together and fall from the sky Snow joke"
"When one door closes... An incognito window opens."
"facte: you eat 28 spiders in your lifetime. always 28. if you are about to die and you have only eaten 3 then 25 spiders arrive at once"
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