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Joke of the Day

"Why can't SCAT be legally banned? I could've gone my whole life without seeing that shit."

"I hope the members of Chumbawmba have those Life Alert bracelets, you know, in case they finally can't get up again."

"FUCK YEAH I GOT A CRIMINAL RECORD *smooth criminal blasts an i bust out sick mj moves* ""congrats sir u are now manager of this kfc/taco bell"

"Why don't Mexicans blow their noses? So that they have something to pick in the off-season."

"How many ants does it take to screw in a light bulb? A light bulb weighs about 50g and a single ant can lift about .2g, so it takes somewhere around 250 ants working together."

"The only good thing to ever come out of Oklahoma: An empty greyhound."

"Anti-vaxxers hate Lil John He's always promoting shots."

"What do you get when you cross a regular potato and a sweet potato? A tater tot."

"Ever been so tired at work that people thought you were drunk? I hope so because that's the only excuse I have for being drunk at work."

"Confucius say, man who fart in church. Sit in own pew."