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Joke of the Day

"[car dealership] ""Why is some guy out there screaming insults at all the vehicles?"" *Sees sign PRE-OWNED CARS* ""Oh."""

"BREAKING NEWS! Lorena Bobbitt involved in a road rage incident. She cut off some dick in traffic."

"In grocery store & guy grabs my hand,starts to walk.I go with him, till he turns & realizes I'm not his wife.We broke it off...Single again"

"Why is divorce so expensive? Because it's worth it."

"A dyslexic man... Walks into a bra."

"The urgent care center in town was torn down... ...it was clinically depressed"

"Wife: every time we argue, you think you're right.... Me: yes, if I thought you were right, we"

"Are you the fourth derivative of a position function? Cause you're a jerk!"

"How do you stop the Polish army on horseback? Unplug the merry-go-round."

"My greatest talent is being able to watching 5 years worth of a TV shows in one week."