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Joke of the Day

"Old people always poke me at weddings and say ""You're next"" So I started doing the same to them at funerals"

"Learn how to avoid internet rip offs..... Send me Reddit gold and I will give you valuable information on how to avoid future scams."

"""Were you in Paris on your vacation?"" ""I don't know my wife got the tickets."""

"Did you hear about the gay midget? He was a little quiet."

"Why did the man drink two beers with his lunch? Because he wanted to drink two beers with his lunch."

"How do you kill a hipster? You drown him in the mainstream."

"A schizophrenic soldier took an enemy battalion prisoner. It was easy, he had them surrounded."

"America! Where we celebrate mediocrity! 15 year olds should not be praised for losing 50 pounds while still being 300 plus..."

"It's sad that the only thing great about my job is that my chair spins -__-"

"Did you ever see that movie about constipation? of course not, it never came out."