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Joke of the Day

"I don't pluck my unibrow to look good, I do it because McDonald's sued me for illegal use of the double arches."

"I have a dog with no legs. His name is Cigarette because I have to take him out for a drag."

"You and my mother are the only women in my life! Said the redneck."

"Suddenly she was on her back, clothes strewn everywhere and her wrists bound to her ankles. She always had trouble hanging out the washing."

"If you love something set it free,unless it's a lion. Don't do that."

"why is there no windows 9? Because 7 8 9!"

"Two hippies, a man and a woman, fell off a cliff at the same time. Which one died first? Neither. It was a tie-die."

"My wife says she hates domestic abuse So I now do my crunches outside the house"

"Minecraft: Story Mode Nerdcubed did it better nearly half a decade sooner"

"[AMA Request] A hipster who admits he/she is a hipster."