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Joke of the Day

"The other day I asked my Father how it felt to have such a wonderful Son. ""Ask your Grandfather"", he said."

"What's the difference between a High School girls track team and a tribe of pigmy? Pigmies are a cunning bunch of runts."

"Doctor, Doctor... I have a steering wheel in my pants. It's driving me nuts!"

"Why are black people so fast? Cause the slow ones are in jail"

"What I Say To 7: ""This is just between us"" What 7 Hears: ""Tell Mom everything and please embellish it to make it sound 100 times worse"""

"How to get a woman: 1) find one who sells cars 2) take a test drive 3) just keep driving She's yours now, plus you have a new car."

"Dairy farmers are always complaining about the wages they get paid... To be honest, I think they're milking it"

"Sorry I pretended I was drowning so you could see how incredible my hair looked underwater."

"Why did the miner feel so low? He was in a deep depression."

"Thanks to Twitter, I can't go anywhere without my mobile. Quick question. Do I take this man to be my lawfully wedded husband?"