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Joke of the Day

"The job hunt is going great I just spent 45 minutes applying online for a position at a company called ""Commercial Space Available."""

"Men at 25 plays football. Men at 40 plays tennis. Men at 60 plays golf. Have you noticed that as you get older your balls get smaller ?"

"Why was the Japanese man so careful when walking in his house? It was made of pranks."

"PET PEEVE: Why do we call them baby names? They're HUMAN NAMES. They don't expire as you grow up."

"The neighbors love it when I practice piano. They break my window to hear me better."

"The light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off due to budget cuts."

"When does the narwhal bacon? Not on January 18th."

"I only star inspirational tweets from 15 year-old white girls, because they've obviously got the deepest insight into the human experience."

"Did you hear about the guy who took some dude's ear off with a vacuum cleaner? His name was Mike Dyson."

"Which do Catholic priests like betterapples or cherries? Neitherthey prefer boysenberries."