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Joke of the Day

"My Bucket List * ~~Five gallon bucket~~ * ~~Mop bucket~~ * Bucket hat"

"Did you hear about the vegan cannibal? He only ate quadraplegics. Credit to: http://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/2noeoo/what_bullshit_fact_can_you_come_up_with_that/cmfd0bj for the inspiration"

"You can tell if your gold chain is fake... ...by leaving the room and listening to see if it talks crap about you to other jewelry."

"A feminist was asking me how i watch lesbian relationships unfortunately, in HD was the wrong answer."

"What did the father buffalo say to his son when he left for college? Bison"

"The 1st cup was used in 1874, the 1st helmet was used in 1974. It only took 100 years to learn our brain is also important."

"I used to play football for Jerry Sandusky. I started out as a tight end but finished the season as a wide receiver."

"Why are smaller breasts better for breastfeeding? They're more of a kids meal."

"At Comic Con, all I could think was how happy these people's moms must be to have the house to themselves for a few hours."

"Yo mamma so ugly When one direction saw her they went in the other direction"