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Joke of the Day
"""What a nut job"" I exclaimed, on my first day as President of Almonds"
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"My black friends really enjoy hearing my lame jokes. It's almost like they've never been told dad jokes before..."
"Doctor doctor my sister here keeps thinking she's invisible! What sister?"
"A Serious Issue Alcohol poisoning is a liver die situation."
"What's Bigfoot's favourite exercise in the gym? Sasquats"
"I'm not sure if my foots been asleep for the last 3 days or if I have diabetes."
"What did the lumberjack see? He saw a tree."
"My husband just had a heart attack during climax He was nearly there - but then he was nearly gone."
"What happens if you try to sit on Death's couch? There will be grim reaper cushions"
"Action Dan here, so I read a book on Stockholm syndrome. I didn't like it at first but I have to finish a book I start, by the end I was really into it."