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Joke of the Day
"I got a new pair of gloves today but they're both 'lefts' Which, on the one hand, is great"
Next Joke
"Q: What's green and purple and goes up and down? A: Barney in an elevator."
"If you were looking for a joke about pee... urine luck."
"I stopped living paycheck to paycheck... ...now I live direct deposit to direct deposit."
"I saw a bald eagle carry away a bunny rabbit today, and I was like, ""well, at least somebody gets to be held."""
"A smile every mile will get you further faster but if that doesn't work, carjacking does."
"This Slow Jaywalker Thinks The Driver Of The Oncoming Car Values Human Life More Than Proving A Point, What Happens Next Will Surprise Him!"
"*buys soap on a rope Cashier: Paper or plastic? Me: Neither.. I'll wear it out thanks"
"Donald Trump, his publicist, and his ghostwriter walk into a bar... ""So you're alone tonight, Donnie?"""
"The other day I saw Denzel Washington walking down the street. I shouted to him ,""Hey Denzel!"" He responded, ""Does every black man look like Denzel Washington to you?"" Classic Denzel."