117433

Joke of the Day

"My parents let me watch Grease constantly when I was a kid & then they were all, whoa why is our teenager always super drunk in tight pants?"

"Why do girls wear make-up and perfume? Because they're ugly and they smell bad."

"Whats the worst part about a threesome? Watching your parents fuck"

"Three of the ugliest people in town were found beaten and lying in the gutter... Police don't have any leads yet, but they think it was a facially motivated crime"

"(Pickup line) Are you a test-tube baby? Because you're perfect."

"Two flies on a piece of shit Two Flies are on a piece of shit. One farts and the others goes ""Hey! I'm eating here."""

"""27 Hilarious Ways You Know Journalism Is Dead"" - Journalism"

"Give a man a fish, and he eats for a day... Teach a Nigerian to phish and he'll become a prince."

"Today I called the rape help line... But apparently it's just meant for the victims."

"It's amazing how quickly reheated food in the microwave goes cold again when you think you're only going to be on the computer for a moment."