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Joke of the Day
"I know peanut allergies are serious but kids who have them are ruining everything"
Next Joke
"Kids here's a tip. Next Christmas leave Santa marijuana cookies and watch how happy your parents magically become the next morning"
"A dolphin was on trial for killing a family member... The judge asked, ""Did you do it on porpoise?"""
"A hamburger walks into a bar and orders a beer. Bartender says,""Sorry, we don't serve food here."""
"You wanna see the most dangerous animal in the world mate? Go look in the mirror. (I've locked an adult male puma in their bathroom)"
"Next time you over hear a stranger giving out their number. Text them details of what they are wearing. It's so fun to watch them freak out!"
"4-way car crash reported in Mexico City. 86 confirmed dead."
"Boy-Girl Boy: The principal is so dumb! Girl: Do you know who I am? Boy: No... Girl: I am the principal's daughter! Boy: Do you know who I am? Girl: No... Boy: Good! *walks away*"
"I like my coffee like I like my women, Without a penis."
"How many electricians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 1, it's a goddamn electrician, what'd you expect?"