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Joke of the Day

"I traced the call. It was phone-shaped."

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"What's the difference between black people and cancer? Cancer can get Jobs."
"Why did the liberal go to the gynecologist? She was feelin' the Bern!"
"What is the similarity between Election and Erection? The words election and erection are spelled similarly. They both have the same meaning too: a dick rising to power."
"What's the worst part about being a pedophile? Getting the blood out of your clown suit."
"Who put semen in the basement? I don't know. That's just the way it's spelled."
"Most computer problems can be fixed by removing the idiot from the keyboard."
"Why do Americans write ""color"" instead of ""colour""? Because fuck ""u"", that's why."
"I have always wanted to start a brand of Christian themed lollipops and call them Catho-licks."
"I heard Oscar Pistorius might walk at the end of the trial It's a miracle."