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Joke of the Day

"u ever see those babies who r born with whole heads of hair and think ""ur going places. ur a baby who gets stuff done"""

"I decided to write a joke about restraining orders. This is the closest I could get."

"What do you call a gigantic polar bear? Nothing you just run away!"

"I had a failed amputation... Costed me an arm and a leg."

"What is worse than biting through an apple, and finding a worm inside? ~~Rape~~ The picky fuckers on this website."

"What do you call a phobia of machetes? Common sense"

"Tell a woman she's beautiful a hundred times and she won't believe you. Tell a woman she's fat once and she will remember it for the rest of her life because elephants never forget."

"Do you call a senior citizen bride's pre-wedding party... A golden shower?"

"Why should you never make fun of fat people who have lisps? They're thick and tired of it"

"(-1)(2^3)()() and it tasted great. (Maths Joke see who gets it)"