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Joke of the Day
"Bully: Give me your lunch money Me (clutching my lunch sack against my body): My name isn't Money"
Next Joke
"Why do straight white girls always hang out in odd numbers? Because they literally can't even Like. Omg."
"My son asked me to pass him the salt So I gave him a soap bar."
"""NO YOU'RE DRUNK,"" she says playfully into the mirror, then promptly resumes disappointing her boyfriend's mom at family dinner."
"Why was the hot teacher promoted to principal? Because she was the Headmaster! My first submitted joke :)"
"I was thinking of making sperm-brand merchandise... ...because sex cells"
"[at funeral] ""my phone is vibrating"" want me to create a distraction so you can answer it? ""no, are you craz- *points at casket* HE BLINKED"
"If fire shoots out of the chimney the Papal Conclave has selected a new drummer for Slayer."
"Do you know how I got out of Persia? Iran."
"Where did the hamburger go to dance? The Meatball"