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Joke of the Day
"I like dating chicks with kids, because snacks"
Next Joke
"Love is grand Divorce is a HUNDRED grand..."
"I was in a gang once. We wore blue, traveled in packs, and ruled our turf with shiny instruments...wait. Band. I was in the marching band."
"Why does Santa have such a big sack? Becomes he only CUMS once a year"
"Two old drunks I was sitting in a bar with my friend and I noticed two old drunks across the bar from us. I laughed and said, ""That's us in ten years."" My friend replied, ""That's a mirror, dipshit."""
"What is the worst thing you can do to a blind man? Leave the plunger in the toilet."
"The Marines are a department of the Navy... The Men's Department"
"Why do people get suspicious when a baby doesn't like you? It's not psychic. It's a stupid baby with shitty taste in people."
"What is the difference between an ounce of cocaine and an infant? Eric Clapton would absolutely NEVER let an ounce of cociane fall 49 stories out a window onto the streets of New York."
"Is it solipsistic in here or is it just me? *noun the view or theory that the self is all that can be known to exist.*"