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Joke of the Day

"85% of Canadian moms need you to fix their computer this afternoon"

"Benefits of dating me: 1. You're the smart one"

"Those are the whitest teeth I've cum across today."

"My friends think I never listen to their opinions... like I give a sh*t what they think."

"A friend asked me to tell him where 'Muscat' is I thought about it for a while and said ""Oh man!"". He said ""Yeah man"", I replied ""That's Sana'a"". I'm really confused now."

"What did one little lesbian frog say to the other? ""We really do taste like chicken!"""

"* drinks 6 pack of muscle milk * * checks for abs *"

"I once let a blind guy touch my face and he thought I was Philip Seymour Hoffman"

"Who would win in a fight between Muhammad Ali and Stephen Hawking? Parkinson's"

"Just imagine if Usain Bolt was your father and you were trying to run away from a beating."