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Joke of the Day

"*First Date* Her: Hobbies? *thinks about the 50,000 piece Lego Death Star I'm building* Me: Architecture and Astronomy. Her: Impressive."

"Starting a dating site for people who just want someone to take a walk with after a big meal."

"What is the scientific measurement for moistness? Digits..."

"What do you say when a corrupt Soviet takes a bathroom break right before war? Now you're just Stallin."

"Slot twist: That USB drive goes in the other way. Turn it over"

"How do you find Will Smith in the snow? Look for the fresh prints."

"Why do melons have to get married in a church? Because they cantaloupe."

"The Pirate Bay's founders go to jail, while the folks who make guns & cigarettes eat caviar in yachts. Legal system working as intended."

"Now that I'm almost 30, there is nothing more sexy to me, than a girl who is fully covered... ...By her health insurance provider."

"How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? to get to the other side."