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Joke of the Day

"A guy was stealing Morton and Everstart. He punched the owner when confronted... He was charged with assault and battery."

"Do you know what's really tiring../? ... being awake."

"Hi-Fi, Mid-Fi and Low-Fi Stereotypes"

"(True story) So my friend saw me browsing this subreddit and he said... ""Is this a subreddit for really bad jokes?"""

"I hold my iPhone up outside your window to play our song. A 90 second ad plays first."

"What would you call an EDM producer on a flagpole? Datsik but not dat well."

"What did Justin Beiber say to his teacher? What do you mean?"

"Sat opposite an Indian lady on the train today , she shut her eyes and stopped breathing. I thought she was dead , until I saw the red spot on her forehead and realised she was just on standby."

"On the scene of a murder.. ""Detective, we found a pool of blood in the suspect's room!"" ""Hm, sounds disgusting. Clean it up and continue looking for evidence."""

"A couple of my friends tried to steal a statue last night... But it turned out to be a bust."