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Joke of the Day

"Q: What you get when four men go fishing and one comes back not catching anything. A: Three Men And A Baby"

"Here's a long joke.. Trumps candidacy"

"If Facebook is conflicting with your real life relationships then it's time to take a break. We need your full commitment over here."

"Woman sends emotional text that's 5 paragraphs long. Man responds with ""k."" Woman spontaneously combusts."

"Did you hear about the worlds largest broom? It's really sweeping the nation"

"Two muffins in an oven... ...One says to the other, ""Blimey it's hot in here"" The other screams, ""AARRRGGGHH, a talking muffin!!!"""

"What do you call the act of press-ganging someone into a monastery? Force of habit."

"Trying to give up cold turkey It's hard though when there is so much left over from Christmas."

"Why was Putin late for dinner with Obama? Because he got Snowden."

"I have the reflexes of a cat, but like if it was stoned."