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Joke of the Day

"tailor's daughter. Did you hear about the tailor's daughter ? She was so good with a needle and thread she never felt a prick til she was 12 years old."

"[OC] I found a dead bird outside. It smelt fowl."

"Why do asians have such squinty eyes? Because atomic bombs are pretty bright."

"Why do mountains make people laugh? Because they're hill-areas!"

"How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Wanna go ride a bike?"

"Quitting twitter is the adult version of running away from home. We ALL know you're doing it for attention and we ALL know you'll be back."

"Why do computer scientists get Halloween and Christmas confused? Because Oct 31 = Dec 25"

"I can't help but think that The Last Supper must have been a bit tense... ...with Jesus relating the bread to his broken skin and the wine to his own blood. I bet no one touched the meatballs."

"How do you say Tony Romo in Spanish?(X-post r/nfl) Mark Sanchez."

"How many points do I get if I hit a Pokemon player with my car?"