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Joke of the Day

"What does SAG-AFTRA call a low-budget foreign production? Scrub-a-dub-dub."

"*queen points out window* ""what's that flashing out the window?"" ""Lightning, My Queen"" *car busts thru window* DID I HEAR LIGHTNING McQUEEN"

"As a matter of fact, I _AM_ trying to cause a big sensation... Just talkin' 'bout double p-penetration"

"Why should I submit a joke today? Because today's April full!"

"Pakistan launches a rocket to Moon. Pakistani News channel reports: ""Water and fishes found on Moon."" BBC reports: ""Pakistani satellite found in Arab sea."""

"My wife thought I was crazy when I suggested a car made out of spaghetti You should've seen her face when I was driving pasta!"

"Women can split open our bodies & chuck living human beings out of our midsections so how about you go ahead & pay us as much as men."

"Who was the only president that was not guilty? Lincoln. He was in a cent."

"What is the capital of Greece? More than the capital of the UK."

"A Trump Irony How is Trump going to keep immigrants out if he can't keep protesters from crashing his rally?"