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Joke of the Day

"Need help with a joke!!! Not sure if this is allowed, but I need a joke that involves the word ""statesmen"" for a contest with my friends. Please help!"

"Last night, I dreamt I slept with a co-worker. (sfw) It was just as I imagined...."

"How many redditors does it take to call-out a repost? WHO CARES YOU F*CKING LOSER I SAW SOMEONE MAKE THAT POST LAST WEEK."

"Me: *drops toddler off at gym daycare* DC: Which room will you be working out in? Me: None of them, I just need to take a shower."

"What do you call closet Purge ?"

"I could add boolean operators to my search... OR NOT"

"My toilet stopped working today. He decided he's had enough of my shit"

"How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Depends on how hard you throw them."

"Our dishwasher works exceedingly well, as long as you only put clean dishes in it."

"I'm impressed with my mom's commitment to saying the word 'the' before every noun. Example: the Walgreens, the AIDS, the Fox News, the Adele"