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Joke of the Day

"What is the most inappropriate thing to say to someone who just lost their job? You had one job."

"If I had no emotions, I don't know how I'd feel about it."

"What do you call a really bad mind reader? Telepathetic."

"[Shark Tank] Ok hear me out. -Alright. It's an airplane made out of cats. -But why? It cant crash. Always lands on it's feet. -Please leave."

"Apparently 95% of the girl like to be waking up by oral sex !!! Well its not true, ""WHO ARE YOU AND REMOVE THIS FROM MY MOUTH"" Said the girl in the park yesterday !!"

"I don't think it's by accident that the ceilings in trailer homes aren't high enough to hang yourself from."

"My mom laughed at me when I said I was going to build a car out of spaghetti. You should have seen her face as I drove pasta"

"What do you call a jewish politician's election tactics? A schmear campaign!"

"What's the difference between a stoat and a weasel? One is weasily recognised and the other is stoatally different"

"Have you ever had sex while camping? Its fucking intents!"