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Joke of the Day

"Apparently 95% of the girl like to be waking up by oral sex !!! Well its not true, ""WHO ARE YOU AND REMOVE THIS FROM MY MOUTH"" Said the girl in the park yesterday !!"

"How did they know Princess Diana had dandruff? They found her head and shoulders on the dashboard."

"What's the difference between a girls mouth and her vagina? There is none. I want my penis to be in both those things."

"What does space smell like? Uranus! Thank you, I'm new here :)"

"What do you call a Pakistani music group? A tali-band."

"Why did the doctor toss his patient down a well? He tried to kill them."

"A friend of mine recently asked me what ballerina's wear... But I just couldn't put tu and tu together."

"I asked my wife for the newspaper I said to my wife, ""Get me a newspaper."" ""Don't be silly,"" she replied, ""you can borrow my iPad."" The spider didn't see that coming."

"I realized that if a girl were to say ""don't rape me"" with her teeth knocked out it would sound a lot like ""doe ray me""... Either way it's music to my ears! Credit: comedian Shawn Pearlman"

"When do cannibals cook you? On Fried-days."