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Joke of the Day

"ME: Wow I have to print this document right now PRINTER: Like, right right now?"

"I wouldn't let you touch me with a 10 foot pole! No seriously, why do you have a 10 foot pole?! THAT'S NOT NORMAL!"

"It wasn't much fun having a broken neck, but now I can look back and laugh."

"What would you call Vanilla Ice if he was asian? Yellow Snow."

"It's an unwritten rule in girls' soccer that each team must have at least one Katie on the field at all times."

"Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side!"

"What's the opposite of wake up sex? Necrophilia."

"this is my son Mason. yes like the shitty cheap mass produced jar. i named him that because its a good name for my underwhelming baby boy"

"I'd eat more chicken if it was branded as ""Tuna of the Land."""

"What is a British person's favorite cereal? Cheerios. say it in a British accent"